Sometimes having dated a few musicians puts me in a weird position. Especially when it comes to this one guy that sometimes comes up in conversation with people who don't know I dated him briefly when I was younger. I don't have a consistent policy on what to do but usually I just don't say anything but I feel a little weird about it. My attitude towards this guy's band is different than it would have been if I didn't know him. It wasn't some great love affair or anything, but as a result of this past relationship I feel a little more invested (in a way that makes me a little extra disappointed when his band puts out something I don't like that much) and a little more indulgent (usually my musical opinions are pretty strong, to the point of rubbing people the wrong way sometimes, but I always cut his band a bit of extra slack...except when I have a backlash thing where I feel like I have to overcompensate). I know that my perspective is skewed. It seems like I ought to cop to it in the interest of disclosure. But mentioning the relationship not only has the potential to sound like name-dropping, I think it inevitably implies that I'm claiming some kind of special position of knowledge or insight that I don't want. To say nothing of the unsavory associations of groupie-ism that this knowledge might conjure up in others. So most of the time I don't say anything but I feel weird, and every once in a while I do say something and I feel weird.
Of course, similar complicated stuff comes up for anybody who gets involved in a local scene, makes friends with musicians, anything, and then tries to express opinions about their music in any sort of vaguely impartial way. It's something I don't usually see discussed but it should be out in the open more.
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